No longer in between.....for now!

My dear friend.

And this is how it goes in life. Moments of pleasure balanced by moments of pain. I like to think this is the only way to really experience the pleasure, otherwise how would we know and how could we possibly fully appreciate the beauty of those moments. I know that doesn't help when you yourself feel helpless as our little girl is being torn apart. It is cruel that you and she and her father and family have been dealt this hand of extremes. She is strong though and smart, incredibly smart and will find a way to tame this beast. Just not now, she's young, but her time will come. I'm glad you have people by your side, this is not a battle to be fought alone.

Perhaps a little news from our end will give you some pleasure? That next step I've been telling you about or not telling you about has happened. Ready? We have moved into a loft apartment. Actually we have bought a loft apartment. Moved in on Friday and are having a bit of normal for a while. It's right downtown between  the design district and Chinatown. I'm going to get extremely fat as the smell from the restaurants is so delicious every time I step outside. We are in walking distance of everything and are loving it. We've never lived downtown before and it's just the right fit for us now. I can't tell you how long we will be staying as it all depends on jobs, but for now we are going to make the most of our urban life. There is still a chance we will end up in California, in which case we will rent this apartment out while we work down there. We all needed a bit of a break from the trailer, besides it isn't really big enough for the three of us when the weather is cold and wet.

Things have changed a lot for us both haven't they and we are still at the beginning of this new direction we are traveling. Do you ever think, thank god we have these children? Do you ever wonder if we would still be this adventurous if they didn't hit us with all their challenges and needs? It's hard when the boy is slamming his hand down on the table enraged and frustrated at our lack of understanding when really it's his rigid thinking that is preventing him from understanding a simple life situation, or when he clings to me in pain simply because there are too many people on the street that day. How can I ever think, thank god for my child and this amazing journey he is forcing me to travel, when there is pain involved? It's incredibly selfish isn't it. But those moments when his super charged brain overwhelms me with it's incredible view of the world, I say thank god for my child. Pleasure and pain, it seems you can't have one without the other.

Be strong my dear heart, their is a light at the end of this tunnel, it's just a long tunnel that's all.

Always yours
Sparrow