A state of inbetween.

Dear Red Bird

I'm in a funk! I'm in a place where something is about to happen but it's not here yet and there is nothing I can do to make it happen sooner. I just have to sit and wait and while I do that, it's getting me down. We are preparing for the next part of our journey, only we're not sure what it's going to be. We have plans, loosey goosey ones, which is who we are. We tend to wing it with most things and more than likely will suddenly turn left when we've been telling everyone we are definitely heading right. This is how we live our lives and I couldn't live it any other way, yet I am in a funk:(

The last post here from Glenn (Hi Glenn, thanks for your great story btw), had me nodding my head in agreement from beginning to end. You have to put your crash helmet on and charge forward, fearlessly! I resolve never to have a bucket list, or at least one I fulfill faster than I can add to it, but sometimes it's hard to get out of bed in the morning and move forward.

I told you the other day that I was uninspired and struggling to write something for Birdie and Sparrow but today I decided the best thing was just to write something. We are reading Twelfth Night at the moment and there is a part (Act 1, Scene 4) when Orsino tells Viola (as Cesario) to go and woo Olivia for him and he says

"Be not denied access, stand at her doors,
And tell them there thy fixed foot shall grow
Till thou have audience."

and I thought, blimey, if I don't shift myself and shake off this gloom, get up and take action, my fixed foot shall grow too, and I would rather be doing than moping. So now I am taking action. Instead of waiting for the next thing to happen, I'm going to fill the time with something else. Of course the flip side of Orsino's speech, the real meaning, is stand true and strong and fight for what you want. Sometimes I forget that you can have more than one pot bubbling on the stove, and they don't all have to contain the finest ingredients. I guess this is just my personality, I always have to keep moving or doing otherwise my mood falls rapidly.

So I've hatched a plan and am off to put things into action, no matter how small it may be.
Always yours
Sparrow